Have you asked your significant other?
1.How many times have they been engaged?
This
is a very important question – if you intend on having a long term
relationship with someone, it’s best to know early on whether they are
prepared to commit to one person, or whether they’re not ready to settle
down quite yet. How many people have they talked about marrying in their past. That may have an answer you don't like.
2. Would you like to get married and have children sometime in the future?
This
may seem like an awkward question to ask a new boyfriend, but it’s a
good one to get out of the way before your relationship gets serious.
Keep this question lighthearted and non-judgmental, and try not to make
any major decisions based on the answer to this question alone.
3. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Do
you see yourself with your partner in 5 years time? Do you want to move
away to study or work? Getting a general idea of your boyfriend’s
future plans can help you to make difficult decisions when the time
comes.
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4. Do you think it’s important to speak to your girlfriend/boyfriend every day?
Sometimes
arguments happen because we have mismatching expectations in our
relationships. Find out what your partner thinks about how often you
should contact each other, before you misunderstand their lack of
contact.
5. Do you prefer going out at night on weekends, or staying in and watching movies?
Although
it’s great to have different interests and hobbies, it may be difficult
if your boyfriend is out partying every weekend while you sit at home,
wondering what he’s up to. Having a few common interests and shared
activities that you can bond over is crucial to having a happy
relationship.
6. Is religion important to you?
Religion
can complicate even the best relationships. Find out if you are on the
same page as your partner when it comes to religion, and get to know a
bit more about their beliefs and their upbringing.
7. What do you look for in a future girlfriend/boyfriend?
This
is a good question to ask someone you’d like to start a relationship
with, especially if you haven’t revealed your feelings to them yet. If
your crush describes someone exactly like you, chances are he feels the
same way!
8. Do you consider yourself a jealous person?
Excessive
jealousy is not an attractive trait, and it can be a warning sign that
someone may be controlling in a relationship. Find out what your partner
thinks about having friends of the opposite sex, and whether they’d
trust you going out without them.
9. What’s your longest relationship to date?
Knowing
your partner’s relationship history can give you a little bit of
insight into their level of experience with love and commitment. If
they’ve never had a serious relationship, or have had a series of
flings, you may want to change your approach and your expectations in
your new relationship.
10. What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done?
Find
out whether your new boyfriend is a hopeless romantic or a sensible,
down-to-earth guy by asking him about the most romantic thing he’s ever
done. Hopefully you’ll be pleasantly surprised!
11. Have you ever been in love?
Has
your new man ever been in love? Has he had his heart broken? In order
to bond emotionally with someone, it helps to know what they’ve
experienced, and how it has affected them.
12. What would your ideal career be?
This
is a great compatibility question, as you each get to speak about your
goals, aspirations, and plans for the future. Your partner may reveal
their passion for a certain career path, or a dream job that they hope
to land one day.
13. How important is family to you?
This
is a very important question, as once you’re dating, your partner may
spend a substantial amount of time with his family instead of with you.
He may also prioritize his family over your relationships, depending how
close he is to them. Alternatively, he may be keen for you to meet his
family!
14. Which do you value more – beauty, or intelligence?
This
is quite a difficult question, and the answer can reveal a lot about
someone’s values. Compare your answers to see if you have similar values
and beliefs.
15. Why did your last relationship end?
This
is a bit of a tricky question, as it brings up exes and it may be a
little awkward. However, being honest about mistakes in past
relationships can bring you closer and build trust.
16. What do you think about celebrating anniversaries/Valentines Day?
This
is another good question to get out of the way relatively early on, to
avoid unnecessary disappointment and resentment. Once you know how your
partner feels about celebrating events like anniversaries, you will know
what to expect – no unpleasant surprises when he turns up empty handed
on V-day!
17. Are you friends with any of your exes?
This
may be a deal breaker for some people, and a total non-issue for
others. You need to decide early on if you will be able to deal with
your new boyfriend seeing his ex regularly if they are still friends.
18. What’s your idea of a romantic getaway?
This
can be a fun question, as you can share your fantasies and dreams
whilst flirting to your heart’s content. If you like your partner’s
answer, chances are you share similar feelings about romance and
romantic gestures.
19. Would you be able to deal with a long distance relationship?
Sometimes
the timing is just not on your side, and you may have to keep your
relationship going over long distance. Long distance relationships are
not easy, and if you have a feeling that you may need to do long
distance, you should think very hard about your decision.
20. What are your views on PDAs?
Some
people simply don’t like public displays of affection (PDAs). Instead
of assuming that your boyfriend is ashamed of you because he won’t kiss
you in public, ask him whether displays of public affection make him
feel self-conscious or uncomfortable.
Hopefully
these questions will be helpful the next time you want to know if your
new guy is your perfect match, or someone you’d prefer not to start a
long term relationship with.
